Monday, 18 August 2008

More Olympic Rants

by Jes

Yes, I am still boycotting/not watching the Summer Olympics, but with no hockey news worth commenting about, and a blogging itch to scratch, I'm gonna bitch about them (again). How long until preseason starts? I really need some actual hockey news or I'm going to cry.


1. It was certainly nice to see Canada break out and win some actual medals! With all of the resources and people we have in this country, the fact that we had less medals than Azerbaijan was pretty sad. Canada has 9 now (at least that is what I heard last), which finally vaults us into respectable territory. Canada is never good at Summer Olympics, but we ought to be at least in the Top 20.

2. There is no position worse than finishing FOURTH at an Olympic event.

You finish last? You can laugh it about it down the road ... or you know you weren't even THAT good to begin with.

You finish fourth? You are the best athlete not to get a single piece of bling. There is a certain cachet to having an a Bronze Medal. Saying "I finished fourth at Olympics" just doesn't sound 1/50th as impressive, does it?

3. I don't get the love over women's beach volleyball. These women look way too skinny and manly to actually want to lust over. I know it’s a major step up from women's gymnastics (no jailbait worth looking at there), but still not enough to make me turn away from women's tennis.

Do these women look hot to you?

4. I will be "that guy" and piss on the Michael Phelps love a bit. Yes, he's a dominating swimmer, and I have nothing personal against him, but his gold medal record is a bit of a fraud.

A pole vaulter, javelin thrower, or a softball player can win only one medal for their sport, right? Why should a swimmer be able to rack up multiple medals for the same sport? All they do is change the distance by a small amount or change the type of stroke, allowing one guy to basically rack up a bunch of medals simply because he's a far better athlete than his swimming peers. 100m butterfly vs. 200m butterfly vs. 100m freestyle, etc ... what's the difference?

Want to level the playing field? Give shot putters a chance to win five different medals ... just increase the size and/or weight of the ball they throw for each event.

Let's give the other athletes in other sports to win multiple medals for the same sport. Otherwise, shut up about Phelps and his record and realize that swimming is the one sport that allows such a 'record' to occur.

5. How does one decide to be a professional speed walker? Rejects from the running team? I've never seen or head about speed walking competitions other than at an Olympics. This is the kinda job that falls down there with "guy who cleans up the set of a porn movie".

6. What a shock ... The Chinese government has not authorized any of the 77 applied for protests to take place. The IOC was lavishing praise over this corrupt regime for allowing protest zones, but, of course, the Chinese government pulled the wool over the eyes of the Olympic Mafia ... yet again... of maybe the mafia just doesn't give a damn.

Of course, this is the same corrupt regime that needed to have a 'cuter' girl lip-synch the opening ceremonies. *sigh*

7. Steve Simmons is still a douchebag. I hope he gets cancer from breathing in too many Beijing fumes, or AIDS from his escapades with Al Strachan. Seriously.

They ran the women's marathon here yesterday morning at the Olympic Games and no one died.

No one succumbed to thick air and pollution. Many collapsed and fell: But none of it had anything to do with the conditions, the temperature or the apparent quality of air.

As if people are going to keel over and die right on the spot! Just wait until people suffer long term effects. Some athletes have already reported that they felt a certain odd 'fire' in their lungs while training or running, and not the usual kind. Smokers don't die after one cigarette, do they? How has Steve Simmons managed to live this long with an IQ of 52?

The most pressing issues of any Olympics -- facilities, housing, transportation, venues, the athletes, security and this one, censorship -- have for the most part been taken care of.
Censorship taken care of? BWA HAHAHAHAHA!

Oh, MSM sports reporters should never comment on political issues (Perry Mason, are you listening?). It just exposes them for the morons they are.



Post a Comment

Subscribe to Post Comments [Atom]

<< Home