Wednesday Wonderings: Burnout Edition

by Jes

Blogger Burnout sucks, especially when combined with an on-off again throbbing headache and a lack of actual hockey news.

First, let's start off in the world of women's golf (zzzzz....), where the LPGA is going to mandate English proficiency.

At a mandatory South Korean player meeting Aug. 20 at the Safeway Classic, the tour informed its largest international contingent that beginning in 2009, all players who have been on tour for two years must pass an oral evaluation of their English skills. Failure would result in a suspended membership.

Wow, talk about really stupid rule changes ... If there is a sport that doesn't require English to be spoken, it's golf. Hell, they throw you out of the Country Club just for thinking too loudly. When do golfers need to speak, other than to the caddy?

I can understand that the LPGA wants its players to be able to do interviews, but who the hell interviews women golfers, anyway? How about getting some eye candy out on the course? I don't think the media is really concerned about Korean women golfers who can't say boring clichés in broken Engrish.

Imagine if the NHL tried to pull off something like this? Oh, you could just see the exodus of European NHLers returning back home because they didn't pass some stupid multiple-choice test Gary Bettman dreamed up.

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While French/Quebec players might have the rep for being soft in the NHL (think Daigle, Turgeon, Brisebois), the fact is that Quebec is the #1 province for hockey fighting. The brawls in Quebec beer leagues are infamous, and the brawlers that province produce are second to none (Worrell, Laraques, Brashear)

So, it seems quite strange, then, that Quebec has taken drastic measures to reduce fighting in junior hockey. It's not an outright ban, nor is it European (automatic ejection), but it's a serious change to how fights are penalized.

From Hockeyrefs.com

Young hockey players in Quebec are going to think twice about using their hockey gloves as boxing gloves in the wake of strict new penalties announced Wednesday to curb on-ice violence.

Hockey Quebec is targeting unsportsmanlike behaviour such as fighting, checking the back of the head and verbal abuse in the minor leagues.

Players who fight, instigate, or jump into an on-ice brawl as a third combattant will be suspended for two games on a first offence. A second offence puts the player out for four games and means a trip before a disciplinary committee.

A third offence means an indefinite suspension.

That's right, folks, a TWO GAME SUSPENSION for being in a fight! Gary Bettman must be jealous!

It seems that The Powers That Be felt too much backlash from Jonathan Roy's actions. (Click here for YouTube goodness)

I understand that fighting in hockey is not very necessary, but it does provide us fans with extra entertainment, and allows for on-ice disputes to be handled without the need for serious stick swinging.

Still, this feels like a gross overreaction. Couldn't the Quebec Fed simply give much harsher penalties for serious incidents? Why should a player be suspended two games for an average consensual fight? Most fights never end up close to being monster brawls or outright assaults. Why can't these bureaucrats distinguish between the two?

I'm not sure if the QMJHL will follow these guidelines, or if it is just for the lower kiddie ranks. This is definitely something to keep an eye on.

Whiner of the Day: Michel Brule

Despite some of the things I've written on this blog in the past, I don't hold any ill will towards the people of Quebec. Hell, Poutine is one of my favourite guilty pleasures. Mmmm, cheese curds ... *drool*

That said, I cannot stand whiny separatist snobs who feel the need to force others to do things in French. You know, have a French-speaking captain on the Habs, have French signs for shops, have French fries with every meal, etc ... it's quite silly. While I understand that certain people feel their culture is threatened, it's quite another to constantly whine about it, and force people to cave in to the wishes of a vocal minority. It's not as if Quebec doesn't get a disproportionate share of federal funding, is it?

The latest whiner: Michel Brule, a fellow who is pooping his diapers because the Habs aren't playing enough French music at the Bell Centre.

A prominent Quebec publisher is calling on governments to force the Montreal Canadiens to spin more French-language tunes for the Bell Centre crowd.

Michel Brule said he was shocked the team's DJ played one French song during Game 7 of the Habs' first-round playoff series against the Boston Bruins.

"We are not in Raleigh, (North) Carolina, we are not in Philadelphia, we are in Montreal and we are in Quebec," said Brule, publisher of Les Editions des Intouchables.

"Anglophones think the only language on the planet is English."

A single tear rolls down my cheek ...

Let's see ...

1. Has a petition EVER worked? Maybe once or twice, but that's it. You know the TV show FAMILY GUY? It didn't return to the tube after a petition circulated, it came back to the tube because people went out and bought a lot of DVDs. Speak with your wallet if you want some real change. If people stopped going to Habs games over this music issue (and they won't), then you might actually be doing something. Signing a piece of paper is simply an empty action designed to make people feel better about themselves, while not actually accomplishing anything.

2. The Canadiens are a privately held club, playing in a privately-owned arena, charging people money for the privilege of watching a hockey in this privately-owned building. Why should anyone be able to tell the Habs what music they can play?

If Brule wants to listen to French music, perhaps he ought to spend his money at a concert, instead. The Habs are a business venture, and they obviously feel it is in their best interest to play English-language music.

3. Snobby Francophones like this Crème Brule fellow seem to think that the world is divided into Anglophones and Francophones, as if the rest of the non-French speaking world is all the same. Come to Vancouver some time, and you'll soon realize that most 'Anglophones' aren't even 1% British, and many of them speak another language.

(Hat-tip to 'hockeychic')

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Playoff Predictions?

Well, I went 3-for-4 in the second round, which is much better than the 6-for-12 record I compiled for Round One.

Philly vs Pittsburgh is the must-watch series, and this will feature a lot of offensive chances, physical play, and bad blood. I'll take Pittsburgh in 6.

Detroit vs. Dallas is the must-not-watch series, given how both Dallas and Detroit can slow down the game to a crawl.

I know I shouldn't keep betting against Dallas, but I'll maintain that it takes a physical team to beat Detroit, and Dallas is more finesse than brutish. Detroit in 5.

The Quebec Language Nazis Strike Again

by Jes

When you walk into an Irish Pub, what do you expect? Low lighting, a pint of Guinness or Harp, perhaps a few TVs with the game on, perhaps some folk music, dancing, and probably lots of Irish paraphernalia.

Certainly, you don't expect Poutine, Ambrée aux piments forts, et Pot au feu.

Of course, that doesn't stop the Quebec Language Nazis from going to work, claiming an Irish Pub to be an enemy of the Republic.

The Office de la langue francaise (OLF) issued the order to McKibbins Irish Pub on Feb. 6, informing the tavern it was violating Quebec's language charter by displaying the imported vintage posters.

The wall hangings include vintage advertisements for Guinness and St. James Gate Dublin, imported from Ireland.

McKibbins owner Rick Fon told CBC News he will not take the posters down because they serve as decoration, not to advertise beer.

Once again, we see a great load of hypocrisy from the Language Nazis.

Aren't the Francophones hell-bent on preserving their 'culture'? Why, then, must be enforce their culture and language on others? Certainly, you are not going to see and hear a lot of FRENCH in a genuine Irish Pub.

Much like most religions around the world, The Quebec Language Nazis play the persecution card, but have no problem persecuting others and trying to assimilate the 'heathens' into their mindless collective.

I hope the pub fights this idiocy and I hope the pub goers get behind their little watering hole.

Of course, they are up against a bunch of whackos that think the captain of Montreal's hockey team should be forced to learn and speak French.

Saku Koivu Targeted by Separatist Morons

Certain Quebec politicians certainly do their best to score political points by picking on non-French hockey players. (Just ask Shane Doan)

The latest BS to come out of the Poutine province is some whining that captain Saku Koivu doesn't parlez le francais.

Saku Koivu's response was a simple one when he was asked yesterday why he doesn't address Montreal hockey fans in French – "I'm not perfect."

The Montreal Canadiens captain's lack of spoken French has cropped up occasionally as an issue over the past few seasons.

This week, it was Quebec City lawyer Guy Bertrand who spoke out about it in front of a provincial commission studying the so-called reasonable accommodation of minorities and immigrants.

Parti Québécois leader Pauline Marois went one step further by affirming the Canadiens should insist on French courses for its players.

Hmm, do you think many free agents to be would be clamouring to sign with the Canadiens if they had to learn French?

Honestly, Saku should have just told Bertrand and his cronies to go fuck themselves, and then told the media, "If you want me to speak French, then ask me questions in Finnish."

Saku, whose native language is FINNISH, a language vastly different than most other world languages, took the time and effort to learn our English, the language of the vast majority of NHL media, fans, and players. He has certainly worked hard to adapt to the North American lifestyle and has provided the Habs faithful with many years of great play.

Oh, let's not forget that little cancer thing he had to fight. That didn't take a whole lot of time and effort, did it?

Last time I checked, Canada has two official languages, one of which most people speak and one of which very few do. As long as Koivu speaks one, which he does, then he's certainly more than capable to captain a North American hockey club. As much as certain morons would like it to be so, it's not the law that one must speak French to live and work in Quebec.