2010 Olympic Mascots Are Teh Sux0rz

by Jes

The 2010 Winter Olympics here in Vancouver have already cost us BC taxpayers millions upon millions of dollars. Besides throwing away a lot of money to throw a 2-week sporting party for the benefit of corporate asswipes, the real estate market has gone insane, and many people cannot afford more than a postage-sized stamp condo around here.

For all of the $$ we're shelling out, you'd figure we'd at least get a logo that DOESN'T SUCK!

For some time, the 2010 Official Logo has been the Inukshuk, an Inuit statue that is not actually native to BC, and looks like a fruity stone golem.




For some reason, The Powers That Be seem to think that any logo that represents BC or Vancouver has to be 'native', despite the fact that about only about 4.3% of Canada's population is 'native'. If we wanted a logo that truly represented this province, it would be an empty Starbucks latte cup, or a generic 20-storie condo. The only thing 'native' in this city is the token totem pole put up for tourists to take photos of.

Yesterday, there was the big unveiling of the new 2010 mascots, and, as expected, they really suck. Instead of using something good, like the Spirit Bear, we get this shit ...

Miga is a mythical First Nations sea bear that is part killer whale and part Kermode spirit bear. Miga was based on the legends of the Pacific Northwest First Nations of orca whales that transform into bears when they arrive on land, but is also a snowboarder.

Quatchi is a sasquatch, but a shy and gentle giant, that loves all winter sports, and is especially fond of hockey and dreams of becoming a world-famous goalie.

The third mascot, Sumi, is an animal-guardian spirit who wears the hat of the orca whale, flies with the wings of the mighty Thunderbird and runs on the furry legs of the black bear.

C'mon! These things don't look at all like the animals they are supposed to be. If I had a kid, I certainly wouldn't waste a dime buying him/her anything with one of these 'animals' on it.

Besides being over-the-top cute, the whole design of the mascots just looks childish and far too Japanese. Yes, Japanese. This is Vancouver, not Tokyo, so why not a design that reflects a North American look? It's as if Vancouverites are ashamed to have their own 'real' culture, and have to pilfer ideas from elsewhere.

The Atlanta Spring-thing now has competition for the worst Olympic logo ever. Puke!